Down is Up is Down

We know they have WMD. They are North, South, West, and East of everywhere. We found WMD. We know we didn't find any, and we know that's because they didn't have them. Just because they're shooting at us doesn't mean they don't welcome us as liberators. Condi said Colin said Bush said this would be an easy win, so it's going well. It is! It's going so well! John Kerry is a Catholic! Iraq will have elections in January, as long as the girlie men voters aren't scared of terrorist atatcks on the polling stations. John Kerry is a flip-flopper! Saddam was responsible for 9/11. Osama bin Laden doesn't matter. Osama is important. Saddam had nothing to do with 9/11. John Kerry is a Catholic filp-flopper!

My head freakin' hurts.

Excerpted from Thomas F. Schaller in the Gadflyer:

Finally, I believe a white man of privilege who was accepted to Yale University despite a middling performance in prep school; was accepted to Harvard Business School despite a middling performance at Yale; was admitted to the Texas Air National Guard despite no flight background and an entrance exam score in the bottom quartile; was given funds by Osama bin Laden's father to start a failed oil company; and was chosen to serve as Texas governor and 43rd President of the United States despite a lifelong record of mediocrity, is a man with the moral authority to criticize affirmative action as a policy that gives opportunities to the undeserving.

Make no mistake: I believe that President Bush, just as he promised he would, has restored honor and integrity to the White House and united us as Americans.